Lawrence Moneybag: *gets Peach, gives her to Bowser* There now all of you can go find her! But, wait, where's Luigi?!
IN BOWSER'S VOLCANO RESORT... (Flashback)
Luigi: *is tied to a pole, about to be put in the lava, and is gagged* Weegee: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
BACK IN THE PRESENT...
Mario: I don't want to talk about it, let's just say, I found a green hat, and a moustache Lawrence Moneybag: , I feel so sorry for you Mario Mario: I know! *bangs head on table* Skipper: Don't kill yourself soldier! we'll somehow avenge his death! Lawrence Moneybag: *has bottle of vodka and vermouth, pours both into wine cup* Well, this French master of Koopa-Land and video game whatnot deserves a martini! *gives martini to Mario* Mario: I'M ITALIAN! *head focused on desk* Lawrence Moneybag: so you donn't want the martini? Mario:... Lawrence Moneybag: That's a no to me! *drinks it all in one gulp* Private: How does it taste like Mr. President? Lawrence Moneybag: A little tangy, sweet, but mostly sour, Private: can I- Lawrence Moneybag: No, you're to under-age for this zesty delicacy Kowalski: I can I have one? Lawrence Moneybag: Sur- Extreme: In your dreams! You know what happens when you drink too much! Lawrence Moneybag: It's fine with me! Extreme: NAOOOOO!!!! Lawrence Moneybag: Relax!! I wasn't gonna give him one! Extreme: Oh hehe! , but wait, why did you say 'fine by me'? Lawrence Moneybag: Because it's fine when I drink it! Extreme: Oh, hehe, sorry Mario: *lifts head of desk, sees green object climb from a hole* LUIGI!!! *runs over to Luigi* Luigi: ahhye, where's my hat? Mario: *gives hat to him, looks at his upper lip* YOU SHAVED YOUR MOUSTACHE?!?!?!! Luigi: I don't think so, I think it burned off,
Lawrence Moneybag: *calls Army Tank, and 100 Union Soldiers* Everyone get in the tank! Extreme: UNION SOLDIERS!!!? Lawrence Moneybag: They'll be nice Extreme: How can you be so sure? Lawrence Moneybag: Because I'm the president! NoW GET IN THE TANK!